A pal of mine  was in deep trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary and his wife was not a happy bunny.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a state of the art gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 60 in less than 5 seconds."

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new set of digital bathroom scales.